Full Steam Ahead!!

I have always been a hard worker. . Since the age of 13, I have worked! Casual, part-time, full time, any job I sort after and successfully obtained I saw as a blessing. I used my work as a driving force, an escape and a way to ease the never ending desire I posses, to feel wanted. I loved working, I took pride in all I did and I thrived on trying to impress my employer.

Moving meant saying goodbye to not only my friends and family but to the tingle I got everyday I walked through the doors of my work.  It was a huge chunk of my world that I sorely missed, so I was more than curious as to what would fall victim to my energy and be compensation to the void!

As the removalist unpacked their truck that contained my families whole world, my curiosity was quickly cured.  The mission in front of me was huge and I was eager to rise to the challenge. Like a passenger train, full steam ahead, I spent every waking moment unpacking, arranging and perfecting; all with a personal goal of turning the house into a home, a home that deserved to carry the name.

I took control of every part of the house, ensuring that all our belongings were placed in the ideal location and that my "home" looked just as it should.  It was not long before the course of moving was complete and I again found myself in search of  a new challenge, a way to  keep my mind stimulated and  in the process gain praise from my family.

Each day I would mentally prepare tasks that were to be carried out and completed prior to my day ending.  With all the determination and energy I could muster, I baked, I cleaned, I built and I just “did, all while being a mum and taking care of my children’s needs. Somehow I found the ability to go on and on, moving and working like a crazed madman. It was only when I began to see the sun lower, leaving its red and orange markings of its own day behind, would I sit, breathe and rest.  As the sun disappeared out of sight, I would smile, triumph over all I had achieved.

It was during one particular sunset that the epiphany hit....

 I knew I was compelled to do well; I don’t know how to do it any other way however while

I had been focused on trying to make other people happy, I had forgotten about what it was I needed and wanted.  I knew life was full of possibilities, it was a saying I had heard many times but it was now, right now that I wanted to find them for myself. 

As  the moon greeted me , a new task was added to the list........